I have big news.
We’re moving back to the west coast.
Those of you who are new to the blog may not realize, we moved clear across the country from Washington state to New Hampshire 16 months ago. It was a huge move. A major life decision that we did not take lightly, and an amazing adventure.
Sometimes life pushes you in a direction that really makes you look at things. Makes you ask all the hard questions. In fact, the last three years actually have come with a lot of change. Relationships reshaped and redefined, lessons learned, new paths taken, new adventures explored, and our fair share of stress and challenges.
When we left Washington my husband’s travel schedule was supposed to be much, much, lighter. And it was for the first couple of months we were here. But then it grew and grew and pretty soon, we were only seeing each other 8 days a month if we were lucky. And then those 8 days a month were spent getting things done that I can’t do by myself, rushing to spend time together, and trying to squeeze in quick sight-seeing days. Everything here is new to us, so we had hoped to soak in as much as possible.
But time is a peculiar thing and there’s never enough of it.
Finally, we realized that although we love so many things about New England, our new home, and our town…some major pieces of our life puzzle are missing. Like quality time spent with each other and neither one of us are happy living 2,700 miles away from our only child. We had to ask ourselves some tough questions, the main one being, “What is the goal? Is this massive job stress and being away from each other and our son worth it? What happened to that work/life balance that we have always fought for?”
The bottom line and conclusion that we came to was this:
Life is short; how do we want to spend our remaining time?
In order to be truly happy, you have to try your hardest to make sure that all the pieces of your life puzzle fit properly. When we sat down and discussed all of the things we love about New England (what’s not to love?) and then the things we were feeling uneasy about, the missing pieces were big puzzle pieces. Not simple little things we all think about like, “I wish we had a hot tub that overlooked the ocean” or “I wish we had a fireplace in our bedroom”.
I’m talking about big things like, “life is too short to only see your spouse less than 8 days a month and your kid 3 times a year”. Because unfortunately, as we all know, people get sick, hurt, life changes quickly. One minute you’re wishing you had more time to spend with the people you love, and the next minute something happens and that option is taken off the table. If you have the ability to spend more quality time with the people you truly love, you should do it.
So, we had several hard discussions. We looked at every option and tossed around every idea we could think of. We discussed what worried us, our needs, and what was missing from this seemingly fantastic life in New England. And we made some tough decisions. No matter how much you love the area you live in, the comfortable paycheck, the gorgeous house, when the major things that are important to you are out of balance, it only takes a short time to realize absolutely nothing can make up for those things.
We’re downsizing. My husband is looking for a new job with less travel and less stress, the house is sold (thank you God!), the moving company comes at the end of April, and we’re heading back west to be closer to our son and families.
Where in the west we’re not sure. We don’t know where our permanent home will be just yet. There’s still lots of unanswered questions and things to consider and think about. And if you’re not careful you can just think everything absolutely to death. (I’m a pro at that.)
For now, we’ve done the most important part. Taken action and steps in the right direction.
We’ve made the tough decisions. And I must say, although making another major life change in less than 2 years is extremely and shockingly stressful, I’m SO thankful that we had the cojones to face the tough decisions.
We’ve learned a little something in our last 26 years together. We’ve worked hard to be a team. And we’re incredibly thankful that together, we have enough courage to say, “stop” and then take the difficult leap into the unknown to have a more fulfilling life.
Isn’t it interesting, that sometimes the toughest choices are just simply about making the conscious decision to live with less so you can experience more.
So, strap in tight, we’re headed on another adventure!